My October Surprise

After 2.5 years since I last wrote on Thirty30Courtney, here I am finding myself “officially” back on some sort of writing journey. For those of you that know me, know that I suffered an incredible loss 4 months ago (more about that here) and ever since then I have been slowly trying to pick up the pieces and rest. My FMLA journey from my 9-5 is starting to wind down and while I am processing many feelings about that, I do have to give praise to the blessing that I was able to take a step back from my “normal” day-to-day.

While I have been dealing with a new life in COVID, then Life 2.0 without Jerry, I have been asking “what do I want my life to look like?” “What stays and what goes?” It’s no secret that I’ve been feeling a little boxed in on my professional journey and I have said many prayers about my next steps. Dealing with life as a Black woman in America has been especially difficult these past few months but to experience death just sent me into a tailspin. July was rough. August was hard. September sucked. But along came October. On an Instagram post I shared on October 1, I simply wrote-

Dear October,

I need you to act right. But I know that by month’s end, I’ll be “on my way” in a good way. I proclaim peace. I proclaim career growth & excellence. I proclaim prosperity for myself and my fellow Black kings, queens, & royals in between. And my dear heavenly angel makes 90 in a few days but since Big Homie decided he would party in the sky... let’s make it live.

I’ll just call it from woman’s lips to God’s ears because October has been the most peaceful month I’ve had in awhile, and probably the happiest too. I am officially feeling “on my way” and entrepreneurship has officially fallen in my lap. I managed to have a decent half-birthday. I celebrated my godfather’s first heavenly birthday with some special individuals and I know where I’d like to go next career wise. Therefore, I decided to call the journey of the last 31 days my “October surprise” and knew that I wanted to finally hit “publish” on this site and make it live. Happy Halloween, right?

I still have a lot of questions and feelings I am working through (shoutout to therapy) but I’m happy to be back in this space. It’s a bit awkward to put myself out there instead of doing it for others, so I appreciate you rocking with me and allowing me to grow in this process. There’s still so much I want to do with this website but my main focus right now is landing some more clients so the sexy on this site will come eventually in its due time.

Be easy as we get through these “last” 3 days of #Elections2020 and be sure to take care of yo’self.

In community,

CJ